I accept my life is not always going to feel like the sun is shining but there is a need for me to get up and get out of bed, move my body and eat well, even when I don't feel like it I need to live through all those emotions.
In another confrontational honest blog post, the past 8 weeks have been hard, I have felt an immense sense of self loathing and just not being good enough for most aspects of my life and especially for the people I am entrusted to love and care for above all else.
There are times of feeling completely inadequate in my role at work both for SS and with the role I have at Wood Ideas, as a wife, mother, daughter, sister and friend. In all honesty I was barely hanging on, the depression and depth of feeling isolated while surrounded by people was suffocating but I was continuing to believe it will pass, that I can move past it and see a way out of the tunnel.
What that meant has meant is I want to shut myself off from everybody and everything, I don't try to maintain relationships, I feel overwhelmed making simple decisions and committing or over committing to everything else is easy because I don't want to feel or let anyone know how I am feeling.
So for today I am open to feeling better in the near future and I will commit to taking each day with a thankful breath and accepting what blessing it is to be alive.
In terms of fitness/ fat loss/ exercise I need to get my mojo back and find my love for all things exercise again.
